I spend a great deal of time in resistance. I push and I pull and so often against the grain. When will I find that persistent fluidity of movement, fluidity of thought.
It’s the hiccups that throw me for the biggest loops. Legs too tired to keep pedalling or running because I haven’t eaten enough. Surprise meetings at work that I have no preparation for. But there’s more than this. It runs much deeper than this. When the evening is so completely serene with it’s muddled and burnt orange sky far down the valley, why do I feel so distant?
Oddly, as base as it seems, I should probably have signed up for the 24 Hours of Adrenaline solo event. I think bearing down into something like that would appease what I miss.